"We'll see" sounds harmless.
It sounds like a pause, not an answer.
But your father-in-law hears something different.
He hears a door left open, not closed.
That's why he keeps walking back through it, dinner after dinner.
Here's what's actually happening when you say those two words, and five sneakier ways to make the questions stop.
1. The "We'll See" Trap Reads as an Invitation, Not a Boundary
"We'll see" isn't neutral.
It tells your father-in-law the topic is still open for debate.
So he treats every dinner as another round in that debate.
That's not bad luck.
That's how vague answers work on people who want a specific outcome.
This isn't only about you.
Firmly childfree couples get the same treatment after saying "we've decided."
Relatives hear certainty and assume something is being hidden underneath it.
Calm gets read as code for "struggling," not as an actual answer.
A calm "maybe" reads as a maybe, not a no.
He hears "keep asking, I might come around."
So he does exactly that, again and again before dessert.
The redirect works by removing the opening he thinks he has, not by picking better words.
The first time you try a real redirect, expect a harder push.
He's testing whether this new answer is a fluke.
Repeat it once more, exactly the same way, and the pushing usually fades.
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2. The Boring Redirect Beats the Clever Comeback Every Time
A sharp comeback feels satisfying for a moment.
Then it becomes new material.
Your father-in-law repeats it to his brother, adds his own spin.
Now you're the story, not the potatoes.
A boring answer gives him nothing to retell.
Try something flat, like "we're focused on saving up right now."
Then move straight to the food or the game on TV.
No pause, no eye contact that invites a follow-up.
A physical pivot helps too.
Reach for your drink, pass a dish, comment on the weather.
Small movements end a topic faster than any clever sentence can.
Humor invites him to top your joke with a sharper one.
Boring invites him to simply move on.
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3. "I'm Only Asking Because I Care" Has a One-Line Answer
Eventually someone says, "I'm only asking because I care."
That line is designed to make silence feel rude.
It's also designed to make deflection feel cold.
You don't need to prove your reasons to answer it.
Try, "I know, you'll be the first to hear when there's news."
That line works no matter where you stand, undecided, waiting, or done having kids.
It doesn't hint at infertility, timing, or trouble in the marriage.
It doesn't compare your life to your cousin's private struggle either.
It just closes the door gently, without slamming it.
Say it the same way every single time.
Expect to repeat it a few times before it sticks.
That's normal, not a sign your line isn't working.
If you're firmly done having kids, this line still protects you.
You don't have to announce your decision to end the debate.
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4. One Partner Shouldn't Carry the Whole Table Alone
If your husband stays quiet through this, it isn't neutral.
Silence tells his father the question is fair game to repeat.
Agree on one shared line before you ever sit down to dinner.
When his dad brings it up, let your husband answer first sometimes.
"We're saving for our own place before anything else" lands differently from him.
It doesn't make dinner more tense.
It actually spreads the pressure instead of aiming it at you alone.
That matters more when you're living under his parents' roof.
You can't afford a blowup, and you shouldn't have to.
A shared script protects the relationship on both sides of the table.
If his mother tries to smooth things over publicly, let her.
A quiet assist from a host isn't the same as a scene.
It only becomes exposure if it's loud or dragged out.
Quiet backup from either side of the family works the same way.
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5. A Repeatable Script Beats Hoping It Blows Over
Laughing it off worked for a little while.
Changing the subject to the green beans worked for even less time.
That's the problem with reacting instead of repeating.
A new joke or deflection every time gives him new ground to test.
The same flat line, said the same calm way, gives him nothing new.
Say it, pivot, and don't check his face for a reaction.
Do that every single dinner, no matter how many times he circles back.
Eventually the question gets boring, because you never feed it.
This works the same if you're certain or still deciding.
The line doesn't require you to know your own answer yet.
Nobody at that table needs your timeline, only your calm.
You're not trying to win an argument here.
You're just making the topic too boring to keep chasing.
Some couples aren't stalling at all.
They're quietly trying, on their own timeline, for their own reasons.
If that's you, the prep matters more than the performance at dinner.
Getting your body ready is a private project, not a public one.
That's a separate conversation, worth having with each other first.
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